[ It makes it easier to forget, drinking. Drinking until you don't have the mental capacity to recall the way the tunnels cave in around you. Letting enough alcohol settle into your system that you just let your body take over and don't think about the kid who was screaming when you pressed cigarette stubs into his bound arms. One would think she has less to forget now - the memories of the end of June, while still lingering, aren't the only thing on peoples' tongues any more and a lot of things are going right. The healing trinkets worked, and are proving popular enough that she's busy making more most nights and -
Well. There's also the obvious.
But looking at the good and the bad and trying to concentrate on the former sounds far more simple than it is. There's no cure-all for the kind of issues that lurk deep in memories, waiting for the moments where everything stills and lurching, making it impossible to remember any of the good things.
So, one distracts oneself with alcohol. Or, on days like today, drinks until one starts thinking about all the reasons one usually distracts oneself.
And then distract yourself from those, too.
(There was a point in here. She's pretty sure it disappeared with the last shot she had.)
Kate would thank Dean for not mentioning the betrayal of her facial muscles or her fingers as they seem determined to let themselves be seen in ways she normally has under lock and key, but she doesn't do more than let her face rearrange into something more neutral and glance away for a moment. Marc was good at that too - pulling her out of bad situations; less with nice words and inspiring speeches (he was never all that optimistic either; more determined and practical, personable when he needed to be) and more literally, but all the same. ] Someone has t' do it. [ Be optimistic, drive the others insane with their incessant sunny outlook. ] World would be boring otherwise. [ It's one of the few things she believes, even when everything feels like it should be grim. People should be different, have different views and opinions. Different ways of getting to places, even if those places are the same.
(If Faith says we can do it, we can change things!, Kate says we have to do it, or no one else will and Alicia is I want to do it, for me.) ]
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no one needs things like /therapy/ or /grief counselling/ those have n e v e r worked...
Date: 2016-08-06 08:21 pm (UTC)Well. There's also the obvious.
But looking at the good and the bad and trying to concentrate on the former sounds far more simple than it is. There's no cure-all for the kind of issues that lurk deep in memories, waiting for the moments where everything stills and lurching, making it impossible to remember any of the good things.
So, one distracts oneself with alcohol. Or, on days like today, drinks until one starts thinking about all the reasons one usually distracts oneself.
And then distract yourself from those, too.
(There was a point in here. She's pretty sure it disappeared with the last shot she had.)
Kate would thank Dean for not mentioning the betrayal of her facial muscles or her fingers as they seem determined to let themselves be seen in ways she normally has under lock and key, but she doesn't do more than let her face rearrange into something more neutral and glance away for a moment. Marc was good at that too - pulling her out of bad situations; less with nice words and inspiring speeches (he was never all that optimistic either; more determined and practical, personable when he needed to be) and more literally, but all the same. ] Someone has t' do it. [ Be optimistic, drive the others insane with their incessant sunny outlook. ] World would be boring otherwise. [ It's one of the few things she believes, even when everything feels like it should be grim. People should be different, have different views and opinions. Different ways of getting to places, even if those places are the same.
(If Faith says we can do it, we can change things!, Kate says we have to do it, or no one else will and Alicia is I want to do it, for me.) ]